Bananas

I just want to talk about bananas for a moment if you’d be so kind to allow me. Bananas. Where to begin? There’s so much to say on the topic of the oh so divine banana. Often thought of as banal and unexciting, commonplace, abundant in most supermarkets, bananas don’t get the clout they deserve. For me, they are the answer to most—if not all—problems. Headache? Eat a banana. Need a little something sweet? Banana. On the brink of a breakup? Both parties should eat a Banana before the say something they might regret. Spiraling in existential dread? BANANA. Hyper-fixating on your own loneliness? Again, the banana is always the answer. 

A TikTok filter recently told me that if I were a fruit, I’d be a pomegranate (the audacity!). This struck me as wildly inaccurate and mildly insulting. I feel, at my core, that I am a banana. Actually, I believe I have eaten so many bananas in my lifetime, that I suspect banana could easily be detected in my blood. What I’m saying is that this b*tch isn’t potassium deficient. I hope this post wasn’t too political. I don’t want any drama ok. My point is simple: bless the banana.